What happens after your finger touches the voice mail button and your heart plummets to your knees? After the heart attack, the truck roll over, or the limb shattering fall?
As I listen to the stranger’s voice explaining why my husband hadn’t arrived home tonight, my ear zeros in on the words, “not opening his eyes, not moving his arms, running a stroke alert now.”
I step back to recover from the blow and visualize my husband lying in an Emergency Room an hour away. My mind seizes and icy dread flows into my veins. How long ago was this recorded?
My mind twirls in a frenzy as I grab shoes, a sweater, and my car keys. My heart thumps wildly as I navigate unfamiliar roads.
Just one hour before the recorded message, I wrote in my journal, “Thank you Heavenly Father for protecting and shielding me. I may be attacked by a death blow, but you gave me your armor and it will deflect the strike. I will survive unscathed, praising the glory of God!”
One short hour later, I’m praying for my husband’s survival.
Standing beside the hospital bed I watch my husband’s closed eyes slowly turn towards my voice. Wondering why he won’t look at me, I listen to his story unfold in painful pauses. He was walking to his truck to drive the hour trip home when he felt a sudden flush.
Sweating profusely in the Florida heat isn’t unusual. Neither is cranking up the A.C. to full capacity while plopping into the driver’s seat. However sudden urges to vomit, so forceful to cause him to stumble out of his vehicle raises even his own eyebrow. Finally, his paramedic skills kick in as he dials for security.
Watching his tongue wet his lip, all I can focus on is my own reaction. Praise God! I’m so thankful you weren’t driving. He was at work where people knew him by name and responded quickly to help him.
2 Thessalonians 3:3 sprung to my thoughts, “The Lord is faithful and He will strengthen you and guard you from the evil one.” Thank you Lord, I mentally whisper, I need your strength now to keep from panicking.
Not knowing what to say, but desperately trying to hide how scared I felt. I rambled on about unimportant daily events just to fill in the uncomfortably long bout of silence.
No reassurance was to be found by holding my husband’s hand. His fingers lay limp and unmoving. Tendrils of fear hammered into my emotions. “Not a full blown stroke” comforts me, but Jim’s strong warm arms lay unmoving upon the hospital bed. As the petite nurses asks him to roll onto his side, his face struggles but his body remains motionless. Icy claws clutch my heart. My mind is paralyzed.
How do I fight fear?
God graciously gives wisdom to all who ask but the secret is you must believe and not doubt. Or else, you will be like a wave of the sea tossed and blown by the wind. ( James 1:5-6) Please Lord, give me wisdom to fight fear, don’t allow your daughter to be tossed and blown by this wind.
My mind recalls (Mark 9:22) the man who asked Jesus, “If you can do anything, have compassion on us and help us.
“If you can?” said Jesus. “Everything is possible for one who believes.”
Immediately the boy’s father exclaimed, “I do believe.” But before he finished that sentence, he quickly cried out, “Help me overcome my unbelief!”
Yes, Jesus, Help me overcome my unbelief! I believe Jesus Christ has the power to heal, but an ember of fear sparks deep within my soul.
I recall Jesus’ statement saying “Truly, truly I say to you, the Son can do nothing of Himself, unless it is something He sees the Father doing.” (John 5:19) Jesus obeys His Father’s will.
As fear flares intensely in my chest, I call on my Heavenly Father to remove it. He soothes my inner being by bringing a verse forefront in my mind. “The Father raises the dead and gives them life, even so the Son also gives life to whom he wishes,”(John 5:21)
I believe Jesus has the power to be God’s witness to all the Earth. He has the power to do miracles, heal, and teach.
As I feel the need to change my earlier prayer, I remember. “And I will do whatever you ask in My Name, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son.” (John 14:13)
Thank you Heavenly Father for protecting and shielding us and our family members. Even when we are attacked by a death blow, you have given us your own armor and it WILL deflect a strike. We will survive unscathed and praise the glory of God!
In Jesus Name, I ask you to restore the health of anyone reading this prayer or their loved ones, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son.
Thank you Heavenly Father, Thank you Jesus, and thank you Holy Spirit for teaching us your truth and removing our unbelief. In Jesus Name, I pray. Amen.
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